In her blog, International student Brinda Paruthi talks weather, food and routines as part of her tips on how to look after your mental health whilst away from home.
When I moved to Exeter, I packed the essentials: clothes, snacks, stationery and a bundle of nerves.
Starting university is already a big shift but doing it in a new country, away from your family, culture, and everything familiar? Thatâs rough. That plus dealing with your laundry is the cherry on top of a burnt cake.
It was also learning how to take care of my mental health in a completely new environment.
There were moments when I felt on top of the world â independent, adventurous, proud, main character energy. It could look like a “tornado flew around my room” and I could move it over to The Chair⢠and go to sleep as if nothing ever happened. In theory, over a face-time call, if out of frame, my mum’s never going to find out đ
But there were nights I felt painfully alone, unsure, or just plain overwhelmed. Nights staring at walls with the clocks ticking and every Netflix series annoying me a little more because it wasnât filling the void.
If that sounds familiar, youâre not alone. So hereâs what I learned about looking after your mental health at uni, especially when âhomeâ isnât a bus ride away.
Everything is new.
The food is different. The weather is wet, windy, breezy, icy, humid and everything that makes you feel a bit less… slay. The pace, the accents (innit mate), and the social norms; all take time to adjust to. Donât pressure yourself to “fit in” instantly. Itâs okay to feel out of sync at first.
But, you donât have to hit a breaking point to deserve support. Whether itâs a small wave of homesickness, a tough assignment, or a dip in motivation, acknowledge it early.
See it, Say it, Sorted.
(*sips tea)
Ask a few questions:
How do I feel today? Why do I feel like this? Do I like what I’m feeling? How can we make this day better?
And if you feel like your answer to any of those questions is off, we gotta fix it!
Ask for Help â Seriously
Exeter has mental health services, wellbeing advisors, and peer support schemes and they work. It can feel intimidating to reach out, especially if you come from a culture where mental health isn’t openly talked about, but there is no shame in it. Youâre not âfailingâ, youâre taking care of yourself. Youâre not broken, this isnât a taboo, youâre not failing, youâre not a burden and no this isnât the end of the world.
All helpful links are below!
Even just talking to a friend, tutor, or someone back home can help lighten the weight youâre carrying.
Build a Routine That Grounds You
Youâre in charge of your day now, and that freedom is both a gift and a trap. Having a loose structure can do wonders for your well-being:
- Set a regular(ish) sleep time (the occasional 3 am doomscroll is okay though, right?)
- Eat something real now and then (coffee, matcha, instant ramen ainât gonna work)
- Make space for downtime that isnât screen time.
- Join a society that links you with people you can relate to culturally, you can maybe bond and figure new things out together.
- If you like being closer to people who share the same faith/religious beliefs as you, you’ll love visiting the multi-faith centre just by the Forum.
When youâre away from home, itâs easy to feel like youâve lost pieces of yourself. Reconnect with the things that make you feel grounded – whether thatâs music from home, cooking familiar meals, or wearing your cosiest hoodie from back home. Small things have a big impact.
Living alone, far from home, can make your mental health feel like your sole responsibility. It kinda is, but think of the opportunity weâve gotten, not many get to travel to the other side of the world to find themselves and build themselves. Do that, and take the help you need along the way, itâs not something you have to manage alone. Remind yourself that adjusting to university life is a marathon, not a race.
Some days will feel hard. Others will surprise you. Both are part of the journey and youâre doing better than you think.
Here are links you can use:
- Wellbeing Services | University of Exeter
- Tips for everyday living | About loneliness | Mind
- Exeter Students’ Guild – Find Support
- Exeter Students’ Guild – Wellbeing Hub